*** ADVENTURES OF A MINISTER-IN-TRAINING ***

Showing posts with label no pain no gain. Show all posts
Showing posts with label no pain no gain. Show all posts

Friday, February 20, 2009

Spinning for chicks.

I'm officially one of the people I used to make fun of.

I spin.

I spin for chicks.

No...not girls.

My chicks.

My bony skinny scrawny chicken legs.

I won't torture either of us with pictures so let's all breathe a collective sigh of relief.

I don't shame easily, but I keep 'em covered as much as possible because I'm tired of deflecting the questions about the physics of how it's possible for me to stand upright.

I was first made aware of spinning a few years back my friend Jack Q who said "I joined the spin class to lose weight but all I got were these ham-hocks instead" as he pointed to bulbous calves and redwood-thick thighs. He was already a pretty big guy and now his legs matched the rest of him. Even though I'm not a pretty big guy, there isn't a whole lot of my five-foot-eight-one-hundred-and-sixty-pound frame [ok...one-seventy...ok OK one-eighty now leave me alone!] proportioned to my legs. 

So since there's a plethora of spin classes at the YMCA we recently joined and I have a neighbor/friend who's quite zealous about spinning [especially before the sun wakes up...wha?!] I thought I'd put Jack Q's theory to the test. The first few classes were excruciating. I kept saying I would never go back. I told the people in class they were insane. They smiled patiently and kept pedalling to nowhere. They knew I would be back.

And I was. This week [I think my third...or fourth...can't remember because side-effects of blood rushing to the legs is decreased brain functionality] was a milestone. I finished a class without cheating. I cranked the dial when I was told to. I pedalled fast when I was told to. I stopped when I was told to and not a second earlier. I had gotten over the hump. I was in the zone. I even went without my zealous friend so I felt I deserved double points. No...triple points because it was the class with the nazi instructor who cranked up my dial because he thought I should be working harder: "Don't slow down!" he screamed. "Then don't touch my bike!!" I screamed back. It was a good class.

So here's hoping the chickens are getting fed and fat...well at least growing. If they plump up I'll be sure to post some pics because, yes, I'm egomanical enough to believe that after this post you all want to see some leg.

Cluck-cluck-whirrrrrrr......

Tuesday, February 3, 2009

Inked.

Today I indulged one of my lesser known passions. Even though I only have two tattoos and know little about the tattoo world I have an inexplicable affiliation for the art. But I'm pacing myself and not acting impulsively because once the ink dries there's no going back. So under the steady hand of Lacie at Phoenix Tattoo Studios I got my ohm tattoo enhanced with a lotus flower background.


This wasn't painful. I have a zero point threshold for pain. I'd say it was uncomfortable. In fact the only pain came about from sitting with my arm twisted behind my back so Lacie could reach parts of the shoulder. When it started to fall asleep and hurt she was like, "Oh yeah, [oops] you can move your arm." Hmmm...like how long before that was she done? Good thing I wasn't holding my breath. But seriously she was great and I highly recommend her [if you're reading this in Raleigh and want to get a tattoo and don't have a fear of motorized needles]. The other tattoo I have is overlapping hearts with my wedding date. It's near my ankle and that one hurt like no tomorrow since there's not a lot of flesh or muscle there.

So why do I subject myself to this? Probably for the same reason I blog: I really don't know. I can't articulate why I feel driven to express myself in these and other ways. Nor do I feel I need to be able to articulate it. If it feeds my soul, that's a good enough reason. I heard it said best by famous tightrope walker Philippe Petit on The Colbert Report a few nights ago, and with that I take my leave...