OMG! What time is it?

Once again time has proven my enemy... or at least proven itself faster than my muse and my organizational skills. But in a nutshell, since last post [OMG! July?! Really!?!] it's been a time of inner work, outer preoccupations, and now I'm back in the safe cloister of academia. Well... relatively safe

Here at Unity Institute we just completed a symposium called Lyceum 2009-Science & Religion: An Evolving Dialogue. I sat on a panel of students from UI and other seminaries as we debated the still-a-hot-button issues of Creationism v Evolution [you can find a decent side-by-side comparison here]. We harangued over multiple points ranging from our thoughts about religion influencing public policy [which is another post for another time] to where we stood on each process on its own merit. I can't recall everyone agreeing on any point at any point in the session, but as the Lyceum title suggests, this was an opportunity to dialogue rather than convince.

Probably the most debated [sorry...conversed] point that came up [and it returned in metaphysical theology class this morning] was the nature of God. More specifically the question of God being vs God becoming. Is God already all God can be or is God evolving along with us? The idea of God being is a long standing tradition of many faiths, including Christianity, including Unity. Recently [as in last century] the idea of Process Theology has been gaining ground. It basically purports that God is changeable inasmuch as we exercise our free will and thought and create our experiences. In other words, God experiences itself through our choices and knows all the possible choices we can make...except the one we actually make. Of course, this approach flies in the face of the "Omniscience" of God, which is a bitter pill to swallow, because as our professor Rev. Dr. Thomas Shepherd pointed out, remove one card and the whole house of cards falls.

Where do I stand on this? I keep coming back to an agnostic [some would say cynical] position of "we cannot and never will know with any certainty." That doesn't posit that either is wrong and suggests that both sides of the debate may also be correct. But I also think that the real question here we might be overlooking is one of time. We humans tend to think of time as linear but it might not be [click here for the easy explanation or here if you want to get technical...most of clicked the first one didn't you?]. More often than not I find myself pitching my tent in the camp that views everything that has happened, is happening, and will happen, exists in every moment. Time is also inextricably linked to distance [i.e. space - hence terms like spacetime contiuum]. An easy example is stargazing. The light from some stars takes millennia to reach us, meaning we're now seeing it as it was thousands of years ago. In a sense we have time-traveled.

So I think any discussion about our understanding of God has to include our understanding of time. If every moment in time also exists in this moment, then yes, an evolving unchangeable God is possible. Does this challenge previous held notions? Naturally...but that's half the fun of this.

My Day to be Gay

I'm wrapping up five weeks of some pretty intensive introspective classes. The final project in the Diversity Awareness class was to assume the role of someone in a non-dominant category. In our society this includes male, heterosexual, white, no physical or mental handicap, you get the idea. So generally if you're a healthy straight white male you got it made; if you're a gay black woman in a wheelchair you're pretty much screwed. And again, these are just categories to help us be conscious of how we relate to each other.

So I chose to be gay for my project. Being the only black person in room of white faces has happened more often than not so I decided to tackle an issue that would require me to stretch outside my comfort zone and force me to look at my embedded fears. I grew up with nineteen years of homophobia programming, and while it never got as bad as this [warning: disturbing video], there was still plenty to overcome.

So click on the link below to find out more about my adventure.

Click here to read paper.

Brain Freeze [plus important PSA]

Sometimes things happen that, for all your logic and intellect, momentarily paralyze you with disbelief. Last month Jen and I attended the Unity convention in Kansas City, KS where the following [paraphrased] conversation took place between her [JEN], an innocent bystander [IB], and an unenlightened booth attendant [UBA]:

JEN: Did my husband just come by and make a purchase?

UBA: No ma'am. I don't think your husband was here.

JEN: Are you sure? He said he was going to come by make a purchase?

UBA: I'm fairly sure he wasn't here.

IB: There was a gentleman here five minutes ago.

UBA: That wasn't your husband...It was a black guy.

When Jen recounted this, my brain literally stopped working due to the shock. Then I went straight to disbelief and even hinted that she must have misheard because it was absolutely impossible that in the twenty-first century someone assumed that a blond-haired, blue-eyed Caucasian couldn't be married to a black man. Even more bizarre was the fact that this took place at a Unity convention. Unity...the poster movement for acceptance...probably the most gay-friendly religious movement...where you could have green skin and antennas growing out of your head and we'd still love you!

The only way I can rationally comprehend the entire incident is to believe that for a brief fatigue-induced moment, this man's embedded world view got the better of him. He was a white man in his sixties, most likely the product of wholesome mid-west upbringing that told him people who look different don't get married. And, most likely because of Unity's teachings and life experience, he intellectually turned his back on his childhood prejudices to become an equal-opportunity lover of humanity. But in that moment, as in many moments of our lives, he switched to default and spoke without thinking.

After getting over my shock came the realization that defaulting to our embedded views, whether religious or social or ethical, is more the norm than the exception. For me this means that any real and lasting change can only come through our children, and for that to happen we need conscious parents. Jen & I consider ourselves students of this conscious parenting practice, and Joy calls us into it every day.

Some of you know Jen has been co-hosting a Spiritual Parenting web-radio show on Unity.fm for almost the past two years This fall I'll be joining her as the new co-host...HUZZAH!!...let the hilarity ensue! I'll be the edgier who-gave-him-a-mic/good-lord-what's-he-gonna-say-next bad cop to Jen's I'm-trying-to-do-a-show-here!/just-hide-me-now good cop. HA! All kidding aside, I'm really looking forward to it. For our many struggles, we do parenting pretty damn well...just look at Joy [knock, knock]. So tune in [I'll post exact link later] and in the meantime check out UNITY FAMILY MATTERS, a site dedicated to conscious spiritual parenting.

Catch ya soon on the air waves!...or would that be the web waves?....hmm.....

Somebody Else In My Head.

I'm so psyched when others can express what's ricocheting around in my head better than I can. Check out this post over at NAKEDPASTOR.

Simple Birthday Complexities

The question of the day on PLINKY a few days back was "At what age did you realize you were an adult?" You don't need to look too far to realize that they're way too many grown men and women who haven't made the realization yet. Mine occurred, or has been occurring, over the last seven months. It's been another reason my blogging seemed to have slowed to a slow trickle. One of my seminary gurus wisely advised us not to use the pulpit [yes, for now this is my pulpit] to do your work, but to share the work you've already done.

I turned 35 on June 1st. While there's no precise age that marks the leap to adulthood, one would think that after having been married for a decade and a parent for nearly just as long, my feet should be planted squarely in this new neighborhood of life. And while I had assumed [and quite well I might add] and fulfilled the roles and responsibilities of adult family man [husband, father, bread-winner, mentor, teacher, house-owner] there was still one relationship that was struggling to come to terms with. It was my relationship with God, which was ultimately my relationship with myself.

I've shared some of my early struggles and attempts to resolve said struggles. And though [by its very definition] the evolution continues, only recently have I found some measure of peace. I finally decided to take the advice I've often doled out to others...simply stop struggling and rest in the unknown. It's not a comfortable place to be by any stretch of the imagination, but it's where we will inevitably find ourselves, especially during times of transition. And when we stop struggling we gain a better perspective. I realized that I was struggling to come to terms with the end of a relationship that, in its various forms, had been a source of great comfort and through which I had ultimately defined myself.

Many years ago I let go of the image of God as the sky-bound fatherly figure and replaced it with the more mystical Spark-of-Divinity within. It was an improvement, but it still propagated the idea that something else existed that defined who I was. To discover who I was at the core, I realized I had to let go of it all and live in the nothingness for a while. My friend Hugh said it well: "I used to idolize my dad. When I turned thirty-five, I realized that my Dad didn't know crap when he was thirty-five either!" So I too have had the realization that I'm no longer a spiritual child and it's up to me to define it all for myself.

It may just be problem with languaging as we try to create new definitions for a myth some of us aren't quite ready to let go of. Some simply label the universal principles that govern us [e.g. cause & effect] God and thus retain the familiar. But I like what Bishop John Shelby Spong said recently [and I'm paraphrasing because I stubbornly refuse to write things down]: "Our divinity is found in the full expression of our humanity." Now here's something that finally makes sense. Call it what you want...God, Spirit, Divine Mother-Father, Principle...but it's just us; an ever-evolving self-aware species with great individual and collective potential. We don't need to pass the buck anymore...we ARE the buck.

I don't deny there's much we don't yet understand, or can explain [take intuition for example]. But as we at some point realize that on the outside we are adults and chose the roles and responsibilities that suit us best, so must it go on the inside. This is a dramatically more difficult path to walk, and one we must each walk alone.

[DISCLAIMER: The views expressed on the blog are those of a blogger in transition and subject to change at anytime.]

Minister [in-training] in da house!

This past Sunday I was the guest speaker at church [Unity Church of the Triangle]. Even more surprising than them giving me twenty minutes and a mic, was the fact that the talk turned out pretty darn well. Music was provided by the awesome Lynchburg band Six Chasing Seven.

Click here to listen to talk [player may take a few seconds to start so be zen].

You can never watch PULP FICTION too many times.

"Prank call! Prank call!"

Random Goodness

Yeesh! Almost a month since last post. Obviously the blogging-while-watching-basketball idea didn't take off. I don't seem to have the multi-tasking skills I once possessed. Who am I kidding...I never had them to begin with. Truth is I'm in one of my reading moods where I'm always in a book and not much else [other than watching basketball]. My Goodreads widget in the sidebar tells the tale. And I can lay some of the blame on Twitter. I don't feel as guilty about not posting since I'm constantly tweeting. So in true twitteresque form, here's some randomness that befell me the last few weeks:

I took on the job as Music Director for my church[Unity Church of the Triangle] which will look very interesting as I return to Kansas City for the summer to take more classes. Yes...still a minister in training.

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I will be guest speaker at the afore mentioned church this coming Sunday. That'll also be interesting considering the crisis of faith that just won't go away.

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Check out my friend Jess' blog Wandering Revelations. She's traipsing all over France and eating all of their food. I'm appropriately envious of course...I had KFC for dinner tonight.

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I am a ROBOT. Click here 'cause I don't want to explain.

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We've made 3 trips to the amusement park Busch Gardens in the last 2 months. We bought a year pass using the it'll-pay-for-itself-after-two-trips logic. It means we've pulled Joy out of school for about 4 days now. No parent-of-the-year awards for us this year.

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I've slowly returned to my lazy bad-food habits [Did I mention the KFC?]. Haven't been to the gym since I-don't-know-when and rainy weather has reduced the bike riding. Jen informed we we're going on the Fat Flush diet again-oh joy.

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BASKETBALL! BASKETBALL! BASKETBALL!!!

It might be time...

Once again Joy steps up to provide the hilarity. 

This past Friday was date night and as Jen was getting dressed she asked Joy's opinion on her very sexy form-fitting blouse that revealed her distractingly attractive cleavage.

Joy's reply: "Um...no mom. Not on you. Maybe on somebody else."

It might be time for boarding school.

The other too-strange-for-words event was the message we found on our answering machine after date night.

A heavily-slurred loud voice: "I want you live like the gay woman you are....right then."

It might be time for a new phone number.

Life...game, cereal, never a dull moment.

He's Baaaaack!

Hey gang. I'm back, I'm black, and ready to get crack...ing on more blogg...ing... aaaand I've just ruled out poetry, rap, and spoken word for alternative career plans. 

I've had a few weeks break [total work overwhelm] and I'm done class for a month so I'm returning to the blogosphere at a time that I'm guaranteed to be awake til at least one in the morning more often than not because it's NBA PLAYOFFS BABEEEEE! so for the next month and a half I'll be a walking sleep-deprived-yet-wired zombie most likely blogging as I watch the games which might lead to nonsensical postings [nothing new] and ridiculously lengthy run-on sentences posing as paragraphs [more nothing new].

Please breathe now if you rely on punctuation for air.

This morning's blog fodder comes courtesy of my sweet eight-year-old offspring Joy and my less-than-perfect parenting skills. Joy was bitten on her chest by a tick [we think] a few days ago when she visited the great outdoors also known as the in-laws' homestead. We thought we'd pulled it out but there's a huge swollen red bump in the middle of her chest. 

And the conversation went like this:

Jen: That's huge! It's like Chandler!

Me: HA-HA-HA!!

Joy: HA-HA-HA!!

Me: Why are you laughing? You don't get it!

Joy: Yes I do-Chandler has three nipples! 

Me & Jen: NO MORE FRIENDS!!

Parenting lesson for today: Yeah...she was watching.